The Masked Quitter
A woman wakes up to the smell of smoke and 2 firefighters barge in to rescue her. She screams that her 2 year old son is still in there, but the firefighters say it’s too dangerous to go back in. She is brought outside and screams for help while the firefighters put out the fire. Suddenly, a woman in a cape lands right next to her.
Woman: Who are you?
MQ: I’m the Masked Quitter, you betcha.
Woman: My son is in there, save him!
MQ: What’s his name?
Woman: What? Jason.
MQ: Oh, that’s a dumb name. What kind of food do you like?
Woman: Jason is going to die!
MQ: You can call him pasta, I like to eat moose also. Maybe I could name my next kid that.
Woman: Why would you name your kid "Moose?"
MQ: Hey, don’t attack my children, David!
Woman: David?
MQ: Never mind.
Woman: Just fly up there and get him before it’s too late!
MQ: Oh-kay.
The Masked Quitter flies up to the second floor and 2 minutes later comes down empty handed.
Woman: Well, where is he?!?
MQ: Rescuing is too hard.
Woman: So you just quit?!?
MQ: Don’t call me a quitter, you are bashing our troops and to support them also, you should stop making up stuff, also, Ashley Judd.
Woman: What the hell are you talking about?
MQ: Sometimes like a point guard, you need to pass the ball.
Woman: What? Just get Jason you bitch!
MQ: Uh oh, you called me names. I’ll just leave and go write my book, writing is fun!
The Masked Quitter flies away and five minutes later, the rest of the apartment foundation collapses killing Jason.
-Albert Cirrus
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